Preoccupied by my intentions and not seeing what I need to. I grow weary of the future, of things I demand and desire. No return for my efforts, my drawn out engagement wears thin like the slow unraveling of a length of rope under tension. Tearing of the fibers the rope becomes weaker, never to support the load it once did. Frayed. My emotions harden and my heart seeps deep into my chest. I turn my head and shield my eyes. My knees bloodied and bruised from kneeling. This thing I punish myself with is it truly my fate? Is there the strength within my withered and writhing body to stand up straight, to move forward and endure the pain. I ask myself "Will the outcome of my endeavors be justified by my reward" when there is no promise of fulfillment. Will I walk slowly into the darkness of humanities cruelest joke. Will I shed these chains that bind me, stretch my limbs and venture out from this darkness. Can I overcome probation and climb to higher ground. Have my prayers fallen upon def ears?